Movie La Talk

Hiya guys, just wanna share some thoughts now.

Movies, well everybody loves movies (including me), my favorite is horror movies. I found it interesting, I don't know maybe for some people it scary as hell but for me it's interesting even though I am such a scaredy cat sometimes. For example, when I'm not feeling well, all I wanna do is watch some ghosts flying around or killing people at some point (irrational though). That's what I thought...

But...

Did you know that movie can be a good starter to make a relationship, social link or whatever. For instance, someone spill that he/she/whatever loves fantasy genre movies and then suddenly someone said "oh have  ever watch...bla...bla...bla" yep that's how it start. And then the conversation will never stop unless someone cut the crap and got bored. Or another example if you're on the move to be closed with someone you just take him/her/it to the movies and then...you know, suddenly he/she/it understand where it goes. Interesting isn't? Well, at least for me it is.

But, a movies sometimes can be representative of our feeling. INSTANCE. You're broken heart, someone just left you with your heart pieces that looks like crap and then you suddenly want to watch The Notebook, then you will just cry all the time until the movie ends. Well, at least it happen for gals. For me? Since I never feel broken heart (by a lovers) I simply just watch horror movies but that doesn't mean I'm hurt. I am heartless.

So, I love movies. Especially horror. (But lately I love classics)

Note, it feels weird when you see your own writing on some cool magazine. Is it?

Xo

Turn Off

Death, everybody scared of death. It's funny though, why did they scared? Death is friendly, it removes all the pain in this life. All of them. Being dead is cold and dark. It comfortable, at least for me. I like being dead, being insensitive and all, I don't have to care about every shit that been going on around me, people won't notice anyway.

Sometimes I always pray to God to turn off my heart, so the sun. But then I realize it's a ridiculous prayers. I just don't wanna feel hurt anymore, I can't actually. Sometimes I cut my hand with a scissor or something sharp, I didn't feel anything. Am I dead? Not yet I guess, even in rain my tears won't stop coming. I also always think, "what the hell is wrong with me", then my other self answer "whatever, just live on". Can actually a walking dead boy live? Doubt it.

I don't know why my feelings are gone, I might be pretend to laugh and all but deep inside there is nothing. No flowers, sun or wind or clouds, all deep inside is just a dark place, empty with no light at all. Maybe if a cut my arm a raining blood will fall, but no. Still, there is no pain at all.

How did I get here? Is it because of him? The that still haunted every single day, every time I breath, every blink I had. I am haunted. I missed him, but I can't. Bring him back to life just caused me pain and sorrow. He need to be killed and buried away. I give everything to him but that's that. No more.

Please, keep me dead like this. I don't wanna live...

XIII